4 Strange Cults

Posted on 05/29/2010
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2. Mormonism

It's almost impossible to leave the state of Utah without seeing one of the enormous temples, or to turn on the television on Sunday mornings without being offered a Bible from the Church of Latter Day Saints, Masquerading under a guise of only mild delusion, the reality of this religion is a little less beneficent. Focused on a God who came from another planet, and now lives in heaven with his goddess wife, continuously birthing all souls, the first of which was Jesus and the second the devil, Mormonism began in the 1820 with founder Joseph Smith Jr.'s writing of the Book of Mormon. Ignoring the evolution of Christian doctrine, Mormonism retreats back to primitive Christian beliefs, considering other factions as corrupted from the real 'truth". Jesus and Satan are spirit brothers, who both proposed a plan for saving humanity. Jesus won out, but was unable to completely cleanse all sins, so it is still necessary to prove yourself to get into heaven, Each member of the church is given a special piece of underwear, a "garment" that he or she must wear at all times, representing the "religious conviction" of the wearer. The church leaders are considered as receiving direct communication from God (which comes in handy when LDS philosophy becomes outmoded, such as the outlawing of polygamy in the late 19th century and the admission of African American members in 1978). All people carry a memory of everything they have ever done in their bodies, and this will be used by God to judge which level of heaven they will enter. Each male member may eventually, through "good" behavior, such as tithing, not drinking coffee or alcohol, not eating a lot of chicken, and having a bunch of babies, become a god himself. Women are allowed the dubious honor of bearing their husband's spirit children forever.


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